| The Fryday Before Thanksgiving(Peter McKay Peter Mckay 2008-11-25 19:47) | | Creators Syndicate – For years now, each fall as Thanksgiving approaches, my wife has been suggesting that we dispense with the time-honored tradition of wives cooking huge meals in the kitchen while husbands wander around the house aimlessly lookin... |
| Shop Till You Drop(Peter McKay Peter Mckay 2008-11-18 07:23) | | Creators Syndicate – I haven't kept an exact count over 25 years of marriage, but I'm pretty sure if you added up all the time I've spent at the mall, hour upon hour of standing around idly in the dress or shoe department while my wife browsed throu... |
| Hugs and Kisses(Andy Borowitz Andy Borowitz 2008-11-15 17:13) | | Creators Syndicate – My father is taller than I am. I take after my mother, who is descended from a long line of tiny people who were bred by German royalty to climb into tunnels to hunt rodents. This means it's awkward to hug my father —... |
| Do We Really Need a Mom-in-Chief?(Andy Borowitz Andy Borowitz 2008-11-15 17:13) | | Creators Syndicate – America is cheering for Michelle Obama, the self-declared "mom-in-chief." She's checking out D.C. schools; she's making sure she's home for the girls' bedtime; she's doing everything but putting on... |
| An Hour to Kill(Peter McKay Peter Mckay 2008-11-15 17:13) | | Creators Syndicate – I savor it more than any day of the year. It's the last weekend in October, when we get to set our clocks back one whole hour. It's like the federal government gives every citizen one whole hour to do nothing at all. I k... |
| Paddiddle! Bam! Owwww!(Peter McKay Peter Mckay 2008-11-15 17:13) | | Creators Syndicate – The pointless game started years and years ago when our oldest boys, now out on their own, were little. We'd be driving along at night when, all of a sudden, a car would come the other way, one headlight burned out, and a bo... |
| BY ANDY BOROWITZ(Andy Borowitz Andy Borowitz 2008-11-15 17:13) | | Creators Syndicate – After the success of Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama's 30-minute infomercial Thursday night, the Obama campaign has confirmed that he will produce another one, this time to unveil a new breakthrough in exercise... |
| For Whom the Bell Tolls(Peter McKay Peter Mckay 2008-11-15 17:13) | | Creators Syndicate – Early last year, our new 27-inch HDTV broke after only 11 months. (Twenty-seven inches might be pathetic compared to what you have in your house, but it was my pride and joy. Were our house to catch on fire, and I had to decide... |
| Tips for a Thrifty Halloween(Peter McKay Peter Mckay 2008-11-15 17:13) | | Creators Syndicate – This past week, as I sipped my coffee, a segment came on my morning TV show telling parents how to cut back on Halloween expenses in these hard economic times. As the stock market went into a truly spooky death spiral, in an eff... |
| McCain Holds Auditions for Angry Mob(Andy Borowitz Andy Borowitz 2008-11-15 17:13) | | Creators Syndicate – Open Casting Call for Irate White People With just three weeks to go until Election Day, the McCain campaign has launched a nationwide talent search to find angry audience members for their increasingly hate-filled rallies, McCa... |
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